you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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