ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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