I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
