So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Randomize
