your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
