At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize