i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
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