Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
being pregnant is like rehab
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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