I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
