is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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