I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize