Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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