I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
