Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
