She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Randomize
