This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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