I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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