Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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