saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
