ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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