Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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