But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
