A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
