just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
