Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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