oh god the rape fog is back!
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
