i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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