so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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