You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
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