Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
My vagina is officially offended.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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