It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
