its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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