in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
A+ Viking dick
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
