do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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