i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
The power of my boobs compel you
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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