Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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