This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Ketchup is God's man juice
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
is it fun? or sober?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
