Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
