I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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