My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
