Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
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