Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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