We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
