How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
