And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
