Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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