Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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