Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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