Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize