I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
